Thursday, August 5, 2010

VBA2C

For those of you who dont understand what the title to my blog entry is I will explain. VBA2C is - Vaginal Birth After 2 Ceseareans. Why am I writing about this? Because I wanted to share my thoughts and feelings out loud in hopes of encouragement and support! Those of you who know me know that I have had two unplanned c-sections! My first birth was anything but natural, filled with one intervention after another. Induction was scheduled because of being seven days past my due date (some supposedly magic number that all women are suppose to birth by!) and I spent the next forty-four hours laboring with no baby! In the end the Dr said, "Fetal distress we need to do a csection!" And of couse as a mother who wouldn't want to save the life of her child? So I agreed to a csection. The whole process was horrible from being strapped down on a cold, hard table - to being naueated and unable to sit up to even vomit - two having my baby seperated from me for two hours after my surgery while I was in the recovery room! I hated every thought of that birth.. except for seeing my precious, little baby boy! It took me several years to get over my fear of having another child so in 2008 I found myself pregnant again. This time I determined that I was NOT going to succumb to interventions and I couldnt seem to find the support at the OBGYN's office and I couldnt have a Birth Center birth (due to PA laws for previous csections) so I decided a home birth was the way to go. I found an awesome labor doula who has become one of my dearest friends! She was the best support I could have asked for in a labor. Then I found a homebirth midwife (should have researched her better) and surrounded myself with supportive friends and family and of course a wonderfully, supportive husband! I was due October 8, 2008 but this midwife was not concerned about my due date.. she was sure the baby would come when it was ready and I was so grateful for that perspective. I was treated like a normal person all through my prenatal care and it was wonderful! Then came Oct 11 and early labor begin.. first thing in the AM and continued all day and all evening. Around midnight my water broke and my doula, midwife and friends gathered to participate in my labor and birth. I had a birthing tub there and that was a wonderful comfort at times. It was so wonderful to labor in the comfort of my own home.. dim lights, soft music, supportive friends... then my midwife told me to start pushing (a decision in hindsight that I think was bad) and so began several hours of intense labor and pressure. Finally after supposedly being 10cm and then back to 7cm (dont think I ever was 10cm) and a swollen cervical lip.. I asked (actually begged) to be transferred to the hospital to have a csection. I was in so much pain at that point the thought of being sliced open appealed to me! My husband drove the car and my midwife sat quietly in the car not uttering a word. I could sense her disappoval of my request for transfer. Once at the hospital my midwife and her assistant dissappeared. Thankfully I had my husband, my sister, my mother, a friend and a wonderful doula who stayed in my labor room. Once they gave me the epidural I could finally breathe and of course I was faced with, "this probably isn't going to go anywhere and so you either have a csection now or later". I decided just to go ahead with the csection as I was exhausted and hopeless for a vaginal delivery at this point. The csection went much better this time. They didn't strap my hands down to the table and they let my husband hold my baby in the recovery room with me. It was so much better. I am grateful for that. However while on the operating room table the doctor looked over at me and said, "Honey, you know baby #3, #4 and #5 will be scheduled csections!" I barely could even think at that moment and I said, "yeah I know." Well, its almost two years now since my last delivery and I am more convinced by the day that malpositioning played a major role in the surgical outcomes I had with both children. I am determined that I need to try for a vaginal birth again! I want to birth my baby (if it is the Lords will). I am researching hours on end, meeting birth professionals, talking to previous VBAC moms all over the USA and I am determined to get the best support possible this time around. There are so many things I could have done prenatally to help change my babies posterior position (anterior is the optimal birth position) but I didn't know my babies were posterior and I didn't know there were techniques out there to help that. This time I do know and I fully intend on utilizing all the services that I can in. I am searching for good, quality midwives who can allow me to labor and deliver in a hospital.. that way I am there if something should happen (though the risk is so low) and I can get some pain meds if I really need them. I plan on having the same, amazing doula by my side and my wonderful husband! We really would love to have more children in the future and so if I can avoid another abdominal surgery (scheduled or not its major surgery and involves great risks to) I would rather that. I am praying that God will give me another child in the near future and that I will have a healthy pregnancy, an anterior positioned baby and a natural, vaginal birth! I know He can if it His will. If it is not His will I resign myself to knowing that I will have done the best that I could do. Though I am not pregnant yet this weighs heavily on my mind and heart. Please pray for me and with me for a my future birth to be a natural one! Thanks for listening to my story and my heart!

1 comment:

  1. PS- I am so passionate about a womens rights in birthing that I am currently studying to become a Certified Labor Doula! I want to help inform women of the choices they have and support them through the most amazing journey!

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